Membership as an honorary soror in Delta Sigma Theta came to me a little over a year ago, and the women, the work, and the welcome have moved me in ways I could never have anticipated. To be received by women who care so deeply about humanity, going far beyond their own individual high accomplishments, is something I value with gratitude.
Every event, every experience as a member of this organization, has brought people forward who come to me and say, ‘You’ve been my mentor.’ ‘You’ve been my best friend in my head.’ ‘I’m here because I took from you this information.’ That has been a regular occurrence, walking around and living my life for some time. To hear this from sorors across geographies and industries - sorors who I can and do say the same things back to - is a gift supreme.
Let us be clear about who is saying it. To be a member of Delta Sigma Theta, or of any of the D9 sororities and fraternities, means a person has already met some significant achievement and held to some high standards of living and behavior. Having these accomplished humans come forward to shower me with fellowship continuously ‘blows me away’. It has also put me back in the classroom and helped me to remember and to appreciate the lesson.
The lesson is this: there are people whose ideas and decisions we are helping to shape without ever having shaken their hands. The experiences we go through by the influence of people we look up to, people we admire, even people whose work we study for how they did that, how they built that, reference us to something important: we are doing that same thing for others, whether or not we are mindful of it.
This sits with me in a business way, and in a personal way. One of my life mantras holds the two together: ‘Never compromise who you are personally to become who you wish to be professionally.’ Living that, with my effort at legitimacy in how I interact with people, is the foundation of how I think we best mentor people forward.
Mentoring runs in both directions. While it’s a joy for me to teach young adults in ways that shorten their struggle without lessening their learning, there are young folks new in their careers who I learn from every day. While often, they are not living the style of life I would look to for myself, they are doing some of the same things I aspire to, and still find joy in doing. (That is its own education, and it is also a lesson in not judging people).
With the advantage of technology, mentoring has become a broader opportunity for all of us. We follow people through their social media. We meet people through the organizations we join, and through the events we invest in attending. All of it is an opportunity to find a mentor––and––to be a mentor.
At the end of the day, it comes back to what Mama used to say: ‘You may not be aware of it, but the whole world is watching.’ Mama said that before social media. Mama said that when we read news in print papers and magazines. Mama said that when there were three networks on television. Is it not even MORE true now?
The people who continue to come forward to call me a mentor were watching long before I knew their names. That is the mentor who never knew they were one: any one of us, living where others can see. We are each modeling a life for someone, and the work is rich and rewarding to make it one worth following.
This right here sums it up for me. "The lesson is this: there are people whose ideas and decisions we are helping to shape without ever having shaken their hands. The experiences we go through by the influence of people we look up to, people we admire, even people whose work we study for how they did that, how they built that, reference us to something important: we are doing that same thing for others, whether or not we are mindful of it" Soror Janice Bryant Howroyd ❤️🤍. You continue to set the bar of excellence and grace.
This is soooooo good (and true)! There’s so many highlightable quotes in this article. Or as the kids would say, “bars!”🎤😅 Your Mama is right, especially in an era where social media (and now - AI) seemingly rules the world’s perception of everything and everyone.